Close Friend

A Priceless Friend

This is the second individual to get a post solely about them in my series of posts about the beauties who have played a special part in my 2018, simply because they are that special.  She is one of my closest friends, who I’ve always treasured but can take unfairly take for granted at times.  I will always see her at least once or twice in a year, but this year we spent more time together, which was really nice.

Pebbles spoils me more than I deserve, which is not the reason behind why we are so close or why I love her so much.  We’ve been close friends since leaving secondary school, where we were in a number of classes together, bonding over music, High School Musical and Hollyoaks.  She’s been a constant in my life since then.

This year, we met up to eat, play board games, sit in the park and watch movies – I’ve got her to thank for watching Inside Out, which I loved.  Of course, there was plenty of chat and laughter along the way, filling each other in on what was going on in our lives.

However, what made her such a special part of my 2018 was going on holiday together – there is a lot more to this story, but not everyone needs to know it.  We went to my beloved Italy, staying in stunning Sorrento, where we walked through a lemon grove, ate gelato everyday and enjoyed some good shopping.  We also visited the ruins of Pompeii and Herculaneum – we love ourselves some history – which was a surreal experience.  Although they were amazing to witness firsthand and so much was stunning to look at, it was weird to be in the midst of places that had been completely wiped out and claimed so many lives.

It was great to eat gorgeous food, see beautiful sights and stay in a new place with my friend, but the best thing about our trip was that it made us closer.  Often, trips can make or break friendships, but this trip definitely made ours.  One of my favourite moments was when we had a frank, honest conversation over dinner on the last night, opening up about various things effecting us and speaking up about friendship like we haven’t before.  I felt like I knew her a lot better after that night.

Pebbles and I have been friends for over 10 years, and I wholeheartedly believe that we’re going to be friends for 10 years more and beyond, as long as God grants me the breath in my body.  Friends like Pebs are rare, precious, priceless diamonds – you do not want to lose them.  I’m beyond grateful for a friend like Pebs in my life, and writing this is just a small thing to let her know how much I love and value her.

My Letter to You

Dear…

Why did you abandon me?  Abandon me like the others who were supposed to be close to me and I held dear to my heart?  You mean a lot to me and I thought I meant a lot to you, but I guess I was wrong.

What have I done that is so wrong that you felt the need to walk away from me without saying anything?  Don’t I at least deserve an explanation, or did I mean that little to you?

If I do mean that little to you, then it means that you lied to me over and over again.  You made out that I was special and meant a lot to you.  You said that you’d always be there for me and what’s worse, you said that you could never stay angry at me.  Now that was a blatant lie.

In all honesty, I don’t think I was ever as important to you and you are to me, but I can deal with that.  It’s not something that’s new and it’s not even that big of an issue, because sometimes that happens in life.

However, what I cannot deal with is you just dropped me without a word.  I sent messages to you on more than one occasion, which I know you saw but chose to ignore.  I cannot deal with the lies that you told and all of the empty words you threw my way.

I cannot deal with losing another close friend and one of the few people that I feel comfortable confiding in, for something as small as me speaking my mind about an issue in our friendship.  Opening up to anyone is extremely difficult for me, but I opened up to you and now you’ve thrown that back in my face.

I’ve had to delete your number, because seeing your name or face on WhatsApp always brings me pain.  I want to cut you out of my life, because I know it will be easier, but cutting you out of my heart and mind is not so easy.

You’ve hurt me more than I think you even realise and broken my heart (although you’re not alone in that), but the worse thing is that I still love you so, so much.  In all honesty, if you really needed me, I would still be there for you.

Just know that I’m angry and hurt by your actions, and I’ve had enough of the crap.  If you were truly a friend of mine, particularly a close friend of mine, you wouldn’t be treating me like this.

Shaniqua

So Close but yet So Far

You know those friendships that manage to stay strong despite you hardly seeing the individual.  That is the case for me and one of my closest friends, who I speak to regularly, but have not seen for just over four years.  This is not for want of trying though, as we have discussed meeting up many times, but to no avail.

I remember the first time that I met him – I asked for an introduction from one of my other friends, because he was sitting on his own.  I hate to see anyone looking lonely, so I felt that I had to go over to talk to him, and our friendship grew from there.  He was very quiet and sometimes it was a struggle to hear what he was actually saying, but we clicked on some level and it turned out that we had loads in common.

We have a lot of similar feelings and thought processes, we both love basketball and we are big lovers of the sun.  It was funny, because one of our shared friends practically pushed us into keeping in contact, as she was under the impression (along with many others) that I liked him, which simply wasn’t the case.  However, we could stay up talking for hours and I felt very comfortable confiding in him, which isn’t a common occurrence in my world.

My friend has a traditional line, which he used when I first met him and he has now become famous for it.  It always makes me smile when I think of him saying, “I’m from the British Virgin Islands.  You know where da’ is?”  Being from the British Virgin Islands also means that he has a distinct accent, which I love.

Our friendship has not always been perfect, but then again, what friendship is.  Yet in spite of our problems, we have always found our way back and remained firm friends.  He makes me smile, he encourages me, he cares for me and more than anything, I know that he will always be my friend.

I wish that I could see him more and I can’t wait until the day that we finally meet up, because it is long overdue.  I don’t say this about many people, but I adore him.  There is a lot of love there.