Get Out

The more I think about our relationship, the more I write down how I feel, and the more I try to speak to you about anything deep, the worse I seem to feel.  And you know what, it’s really getting on my nerves.  I think you just need to get out my life now.

I’m in so much pain, which is developing from emotional pain into physical pain – my chest is hurting and my head is actually killing me.  I’m feeling so angry – all I want to do is throw things around the room, dash glasses at the wall and take everything out on a punching bag.  But all I’m really doing is going insane in my mind and you have a lot to do with that.

I try speaking to you and it’s like you can’t really be bothered to reciprocate.  You’ve changed into someone I hardly recognise, but you think our lesser relationship is all to do with growing apart.

I’ve needed my close friend – the close friend that was always there for me – so much over the past few months, but you were never there.  I respect that you couldn’t be there 24/7, but you came across as so odd and unapproachable that did not feel that I could come to you with anything.  I really needed to know that you were there for me, but it felt like you abandoned me.

There is so much more to how I’m feeling, so much more than you know and so much more than I am willing to write down.  I just know that this is all too much for me now and despite how much I want you to stay in my life, I don’t think I can deal with having you in my life anymore.

The negative effects that you have on me bring me down and the hurt you’ve caused messes up not only my head, but my heart as well.  I’m hanging on to something that isn’t there anymore and to be honest with you, I am sick and tired of it.

And you know what, I can’t keep doing this to myself.  We are not going to be what we once were and I don’t think our friendship will ever be the same again.  I am so sick of trying and I am so tired of caring, because you obviously don’t.

Just get the hell out of my life, cos I can’t have you there anymore.  And get the hell out of my heart, cos I don’t want you there anymore.


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