I love guys.  Those closest to me will have heard me say this numerous times, because I really do love guys.  Yet despite this, guys infuriate me and can piss me right off.

For as long as I can remember, I have always had a crush on someone, although this isn’t really the case anymore.  I hardly like anyone and if I do, it really takes something for me to like them – it can’t just be for their good looks, there has to be something extra.  A vibrant personality, a lovely smile, great basketball game or being really cute and adorable are possible extras that I look for.

I can honestly say that I have liked a lot of individuals over the years, whether they are guys I come into contact with or personalities I have seen on the TV.  They have the been the typical crushes that most girls have or really unusual ones that none of my friends seem to understand.

I also stop liking someone just as quickly as I started liking them.  If they really annoy me or I don’t see enough of them on the TV, my crush on them just fades away.  There were times when I have grown out of my crushes and my tastes have continued to change as I’ve grown older, which has made me look back at some of the people I have liked and wonder why I actually liked them.

I don’t mind having a crush on a sports personality, an actor or any other celebrity, because I know that I am highly unlikely to meet them and even then, it is unlikely that they will even like me in return.  In fact, I might not even like them any more after actually spending time with them.

When liking someone famous, I am usually liking an ideal, which means that my feelings are not built on anything concrete or real.  This is not the case with someone you know and genuinely come into contact with – these feelings are built on something real.

I do not want to like any guy I know and come into contact with anymore.  Yes, the feelings are real and genuine, but that means I am able to get hurt and feel pain.  I do not seem to have the best luck with guys and my love life – when existent – just seems to be a tangled mess and confusion.

Guys would like me, but I would not like them back, and I would like a guy, but they would not like me back.  When I actually liked one guy and they seemed to show an interest in me, a number of other guys started coming out of no where and saying they liked me or wanted me to be their girl.

The one guy I fell in love with didn’t love me back and we went through a lot of crap, which meant we never got it together.  My past two relationships were rushed into and although I really love both of the guys as friends, they were definitely wrong for me.

However, what annoys me is when someone would say they like me and then just mess me around.  One guy kept me hanging on for ages, without a care for how I felt.  Others will show an interest, say they want to speak to you and then do not even attempt to make an effort at all, so I just don’t see the point of even taking my contact details.  I don’t like being messed around, at all, and I would never do that to anyone; it is just unfair.

Many guys seem to mess around so much these days and keep a number of girls hanging on at the same time, which makes it harder to determine when they are actually serious or not.  Guys also seem to like playing games and they are not upfront in saying how they truly feel, making it even more difficult to figure out if they actually like you.

Unless I hear the words from a guy’s mouth and I see the actions to match, I won’t know whether they like me or not.  And if I do hear the words and see the actions, I would just about believe that they genuinely like me, as I struggle with trusting people, mainly due to my past experiences.

I’m not looking for a guy to be extremely forward, but I just want someone to be upfront and tell me how they feel, then work on it from there.  I know that the fear of rejection may at times prevent this, but I’d hope that the next person interested in me would get the vibe that I was interested in them, which would make things a little easier.

I am someone who likes to be upfront about how I’m feeling and what I want, but I have been criticised for this and told that I am too much like a guy myself; I just don’t like to play games and waste time.  If I like you, in most occasions, I just want you to know about it.

After my bad luck with guys and how I’ve changed and matured as a person, my feelings in regards to male individuals has changed.  It takes longer for me to truly like a guy now, as I like to properly get to know them, because their personality is essential and I want to make sure that I like them for the right reasons.  I don’t want to like someone just because they give me the attention I desire or just because they like me – I don’t think this is fair.

I’ve always loved guys and I don’t think this will ever change, no matter how much they infuriate, anger, annoy and upset me.  I just wish more of them would consider how they treat us females and how they can make us feel, with all of the messing around and game playing.  Us females are not perfect either, but I never like to play games with a guy’s heart and I always treat them fairly, as I would like them to treat me.  Although I have met and continue to meet lots of lovely guys, I haven’t met the one for me.  Or I just haven’t seen him as the one yet…


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