They Come and Go

When speaking to others on the subject of friends, I am continuously hearing the phrase “Friends come and go”.  Over and over again, these four words come into the conversation and I am slightly tired of hearing them.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that it doesn’t happen.  Throughout all stages of our lives, we make friends and we lose friends, we grow closer and we drift apart.  Those people you are friends with at the beginning of school may not be your friends when you leave, whilst those you may not have spoken to at the start may end up as your very best friends when the school years are over.  As you get older and it gets harder to spend quality time with the friends from your college years, so you begin to drift apart, you may strike up new relationships with your colleagues.

However, I  do not believe that it always has to be the case.  Yes, new friends may always come, but old friends do not always need to go.  If you really care about a person enough, you will do what you can to ensure that your friendship continues.  I’ve remained in contact with a number of girls from my high school and sixth form, and although we don’t speak or see each other as often as I would like, we continue to make an effort so that are friendship will continue.  Some of the most special friends are those ones that you don’t communicate with on a regular basis, but you never feel awkward around them and every encounter feels normal, no matter how long you haven’t spoken to each other for.

When regular issues, pain and disagreements arise in friendships, the advice from many is to forget about the friendship, because “friends come and go”.  Although some issues may be too big to overcome and there may come a time when the pain in the friendship is just too much to bear, most friends have the ability to work things out.  Taking time to sort out a situation and communicating effectively will solve many problems, especially if your friendship is strong and you are able to talk to each other about anything.

I love my best friends and they mean more to me than most people will ever know, but there are times when it feels like I don’t mean as much to them as they mean to me.  One of my best friends has been my friend for over 15 years, but it feels like we’re slowly growing apart and I do not want to let that happen.  Someone close to me advised me to let her go, but that is just not me.  I fight for what is important to me and I do not give up close relationships easily, especially with one of my longest friends.  I’ve lost best friends before, but she is someone I want to stay best friends with for life.

Friends come into your life and go out of your life, year in and year out.  Some will be there for long periods of time, while some will be there for a just a short time.  There are times when your friends are wrong for you at a certain stage of your life, whilst some friends may enter your life at the time when you need someone.  However, it all comes down to whether you want to put that extra effort in to keep the relationship going.  Will your friends stay or go?  The choice is up to you…



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